Post-Separation Abuse – Page 3 – Life After Narcissistic Abuse

Tonight

Tonight, right before leaving work, I read that Ruth Bader Ginsburg died. Tonight my daughter told me, on the drive home, that she hopes that daddy tells the judge that I took her doll away so he’ll kill me. Today I watched my daughter learn to read new words. Yo soy. Yo veo. I can.Continue reading “Tonight”

Vigilance as Meditation

There have been so many hoops in the process. Decide to be done. Not give in to the promises to focus on his family when I’ve heard it so many times. Try to amicably agree on custody. Lawyer up after threats and attempts to bully me into submission. Get through court. Get through the secondContinue reading “Vigilance as Meditation”

Feeling Some Kind of Way Today

I’m really feeling some kind of way today so I am ready to say too much on social media. To share too much. To rail at the sky with the unfairness of it all. To take out an ad in a local newspaper or hire a sky-writer to do a little large-scale truth-telling. To railContinue reading “Feeling Some Kind of Way Today”

I Have Me

Two nights before what I hope will be my last court date for a good, long while, I was up from midnight to 3:00am. My eyes stung and watered but I couldn’t sleep. I gave up an hour in and started watching a cheesy TV show I’ve been binging (my tastes always going far moreContinue reading “I Have Me”

Father’s Day

I have had lots of rough Mother’s Days over a couple of eras of my life, but despite being raised by a step-father (the man I now call Dad) and not having any real contact with my biological father past age eleven, I can’t remember ever having any particularly sad or tough Father’s Days. UntilContinue reading “Father’s Day”

You Think I Might Be Exaggerating, I Know You Do

Women (people) in my position know that you don’t really get it. That you’re suspect (rightfully so, really). We know that you think that we’re, at least a little, over-reacting or exaggerating. We’re not. We really wish we were. My daughter, five, came home tonight and ran in the bathroom saying, let me show youContinue reading “You Think I Might Be Exaggerating, I Know You Do”

Turn It Upside Down

As I sat down to write this post, that’s been percolating in my head for a few days, the first first sentence I thought of was: It’s been a week. But I’m pretty sure that I’ve thought that every week for a long time. I survived my virtual court hearing and while I didn’t getContinue reading “Turn It Upside Down”

Too Much Sugar

I got up early this morning despite being home all day so I can be available for my virtual court hearing. I went in the kitchen to start coffee so it would be ready by the time I finished feeding and taking the dogs outside. When I came back inside, I pulled a cup outContinue reading “Too Much Sugar”

Return to Sender

I have video court tomorrow because the x filed an emergency motion declaring that me not allowing him to watch our daughter while I’m at work results in ‘neglect to the extreme’. And tonight when he picked her up, he asked me if I had any mail for him. He messaged me a week agoContinue reading “Return to Sender”

Let him play solitaire, baby.

He said, ‘If you’re gonna play the game, boyYou gotta learn to play it rightYou’ve got to know when to hold ’emKnow when to fold ’emKnow when to walk away…’The Gambler – Kenny Rogers. This is what ‘co’parenting with a narcissist is like: Your kid trips running back to them to hug them goodbye oneContinue reading “Let him play solitaire, baby.”