Healing – Life After Emotional Abuse

It Didn’t Make Me Stronger (& Saying That It Did Insults the People Who Didn’t Survive)

I’d walk and think about my entire life. I’d find my strength again, far from everything that had made my life ridiculous. Cheryl Strayed I wasn’t weak when I met x and then I left him and became strong. I wasn’t strong when I met x and then weakened by him and then when IContinue reading “It Didn’t *Make* Me Stronger (& Saying That It Did Insults the People Who Didn’t Survive)”

Ten Years Ago ~ The Day That Could Have Been My Ruin

It is coming down the mountain, fear that holds you like the cold,It wants to settle in your footprints, keep you still from where you’re goingAll you think you know of losing, all you doubt of innocence,The big sky still hangs above you. Every day just want to quit.There’s no light you see to guideContinue reading “Ten Years Ago ~ The Day That Could Have Been My Ruin”

Pretty, But the R is Silent ~ You Can’t Petty Me Anymore

Petty. It’s a word abuse victims have had lobbed at them too many times to count. For years, we hear it from our abuser. Why are you so petty? Are you really going to be that petty and make a big deal about this? Don’t be petty. My ex-wife was always so damn petty –Continue reading “Pretty, But the R is Silent ~ You Can’t Petty Me Anymore”

Love & Hope Day

“Hope” is the thing with feathers –That perches in the soul –And sings the tune without the words –And never stops – at all – And sweetest – in the Gale – is heard –And sore must be the storm –That could abash the little BirdThat kept so many warm – I’ve heard it inContinue reading “Love & Hope Day”

What Must Be Mourned ~ One Year Court-Free, Finding Acceptance and Change

Lord forgive me, I’ve been running running blind in truthI’ma rain, I’ma rain on this bitter loveTell the sweet I’m new Beyonce, Freedom No longing for the moonlightNo longing for the sunNo longer will I curse the bad I’ve doneIf there’s a time when the feelings gone, I want to feel it. The Kills, FutureContinue reading “What Must Be Mourned ~ One Year Court-Free, Finding Acceptance and Change”

Making Plans Instead of Having Nightmares

Yesterday was Father’s Day and it’s the second one since visitations were suspended. Since ending it with x, and seeing the damage he is not only capable of, but thrives on, Father’s Day is a day of guilt for me. Or, more accurately, a day of me battling mama-guilt that isn’t really mine to carryContinue reading “Making Plans Instead of Having Nightmares”